i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
