i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize