Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
40s are totally the cure
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize