i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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