Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
