ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
She said her name was "party"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
