just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize