what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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