the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
