I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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