you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
