Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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