You really coming over, don't trick.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
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