Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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