let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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