I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
You made out with two different species that night
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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