You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I love having hate sex.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
You pole danced in your parka.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
