I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize