So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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