We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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