he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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