Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Randomize