And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
