I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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