Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
