i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize