He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
