She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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