We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
