he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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