If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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