I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
