we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Randomize
