I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize