Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize