There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize