Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize