I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
