He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I have aggressive nipples.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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