One girl and one boy is just not enough.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
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