wrigley field is MILF paradise
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
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