If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
