You're so nebulous sometimes
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
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