3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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