He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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