so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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