Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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