someone threw a dead crab at me
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
