just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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