I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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