if i can run in heels then i can drive
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
